Morris Dancers and the Angry Man Float

Chris and I were driving to work yesterday morning and some how we found ourselves in a funeral procession; and not like somewhere in the back, but right directly behind the hearse. Fortunately the procession was going close enough to where we wanted to go so we were able to sneak out; but it got me thinking, and I think this happens to us a lot more than it should. Not exclusively with funeral processions, of course, but with parades in general.

When I was 16 my friend and I were walking downtown, and we turned a corner and unwittingly ended up smack in the middle of a Morris Dancing parade. Now if you're unfamiliar with Morris Dancing, I suggest you immediately Google it. Wikipedia describes it as "a form of English folk dance usually accompanied by music. Implements such as sticks, bells, swords, and handkerchiefs may also be wielded by the dancers."

We became so frightened and entangled in this parade of probably 100 Morris dancers, that it was several blocks before we could escape.


Last November I desperately wanted a vegetarian sub from Subway, so I sent my husband out to get one. Now generally Chris is a very relaxed guy; however, he gets quite flustered if he's driving, and things don't go exactly according to plan.

It just so happened that this night was the night of the Santa Clause parade, so the main artery of downtown was blocked off. However, this blocking off happened during the time that Chris was in the Subway, and he needed to get to the other side to get home.

So completely enraged he drove for blocks, and he finally found and open street, but what he didn't realise is that they had just up a barricade behind him, and he had inadvertently become the Grand Marshal of the Santa Clause parade. As far as Chris could see ahead that roads were blocked off, not only with road barricades, but with laughing and waving children and families.

So for about 5 blocks Chris, fuming with frustration, had no choice but to wave back at the children, as to not ruin their parade experience. Finally he found a police officer, and he was able to plead with the officer, and finally convince him that he was not the Santa Clause Parade Grand Marshal; so the officer had to call in back up, and coral the crowd so Chris could escape.

The next day my sister, who had been babysitting her niece the night before, called me very confused, and said, "Um, this is going to sounds really weird, but was Chris in the Santa Clause Parade?"