Nature

One gorgeous Sunday morning, a few weeks ago, I had a craving for Taco Bell. It was the kind of beautiful day sunny day, where everything in nature seems in perfect balance and harmony. So, I got in the car and headed for the nearest drive thru. When I got to the window I paid the man, an patiently waited for my food. Because it was such a nice day I didn't think twice about leaving my window down while I waited.

All of a sudden, completely out of nowhere, a bird flew, at like 100 miles an hour, through the driver's side window, and smacked me right in the face! I screamed, and the frightened bird continued to whip around my car and crash into me. I kept screaming, and flailing my arms, trying to get the bird out the window, and after about 2 minutes the bird found the open window and flew away.

So the cracker jack Taco Bell guy finally shows up to the window with my food, and says (in a moronic voice that made me think he's already surpassed his lifetime career goals) "Duh, did a bird just fly in your car?"...I looked up at him, my hair completely disheveled, and my heart still racing and I snidely replied, "Why yes, I believe it did"; I grabbed my food and drove away.


I've been bugging my husband for years now to quit smoking; but every so often when he's stressed out he'll still go outside and have a cigarette. One day, a few weeks ago he was particularly frustrated, the computer wasn't working properly, and he had a ton of paper work to do; so he decided needed to take a quick cigarette break and clear his head.

He went out to the backyard, and as he smoked, he watched a neighbourhood cat chase a squirrel across the awning above his head. As the cat closed in on the squirrel, the squirrel panicked; feeling cornered he had no choice but to jump, but the ground was a bit too far; so the squirrel jumped right on Chris' head! Chris screamed a scream that sounded like an 80 year old woman, and the squirrel frantically spiralled down Chris body. The cat was still hot on the squirrel's trail, so it too had to jump on Chris' head and claw it's way down. Chris was still yelling and flailing as the two ran off.

Chris came back into the house, and I just heard him yelling and ranting, as he went, horribly shaken, right into the shower. I felt badly for him, but that's what you get for smoking.